Vintage Cracked

Glimpses of the brains behind Cracked.com.
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307 Pins
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Special Guest: Cinema Sins. | If Your Step Dad Ran Chuck E Cheese | Youtube
Special Guest: Cinema Sins | Surprising Difficulties of Making Homemade Porn | Cracked.com
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Artist-in-Residency Program

19 Pins
"We should retire the bad teeth as Britain's national stereotype of choice. A study performed by OECD…has concluded that the British have the very best teeth in the entire world, with an average of just 0.6 of a tooth decaying per citizen. Not just "not the worst"--the absolute fucking best! … It turns out Poland has the worst teeth, with an average of almost four rotted teeth per ingenious Polack."
"In movies, body armor (made from a material called Kevlar) turns most guns from magical death-wands to hilariously overbuilt Airsoft rifles. … The type of bulletproof vest you can actually conceal under your clothes provides exceptional protection against most handguns. But against an assault rifle? It's only slightly more effective than body paint and prayers to Khorne."
"Guess what really happens when you wake up sleepwalkers: They wake up. Seriously, that's it. No gruesome deaths, no dramatic injuries. True, they might be groggy and disoriented, but come on -- who doesn't feel that way when some bastard suddenly comes and shakes you awake in the middle of a dream in which you thought you were fighting zombies with your old gym coach?"

The De-Textbook

71 Pins
The origins of Sylvester P. Smythe, the old Cracked magazine mascot. | 9-86
Sylvester, by artists through the years. | 9-86
August 1990 #TMNT #Pizza

The Old Magazine Days

24 Pins
The origins of Sylvester P. Smythe, the old Cracked magazine mascot. | 9-86 Jackie Gleason, Bar Art, Pre Production, Sylvester, Art Reference Photos, Wacky, Parody, Country Music, Mascot
The origins of Sylvester P. Smythe, the old Cracked magazine mascot. | 9-86
Sylvester, by artists through the years. | 9-86 Great Works Of Art, Smythe, Vermeer, White Boys, This Is Us, Figures, Visual, Artists
Sylvester, by artists through the years. | 9-86
August 1990 #TMNT #Pizza Ninja Turtle Pizza, Turtle Soup, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Tmnt, Comic Book Cover, Weird, Vintage, August
KiDNAPPER_VAN
August 1990 #TMNT #Pizza
September 1986 Great Run, Color Puzzle, Witch Doctor, Many Faces, Tribute, Folk, Presents
September 1986
Oct. 1983 #Jaws Barney Miller, Jaws Movie, Bill Ward, Mork & Mindy, The Dukes Of Hazzard, The Lone Ranger, Fantasy Island, Movie Covers, Close Encounters
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Oct. 1983 #Jaws
Fall 1980 "Biggest Greatest" Issue #StarWars Empire Games, Bar Poster, Famous Stars, The Empire Strikes Back, Star Wars, Greats, Big
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Fall 1980 "Biggest Greatest" Issue #StarWars
Cracked magazine mascot Sylvester P. Smythe. | 9-86 Zelda Characters, Fictional Characters, Dots, Magazine, Humor
Cracked magazine mascot Sylvester P. Smythe. | 9-86
May 1967 Comic Books, Novelty, Cover, Magazines, Cartoons, Vintage Comics, Comics
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May 1967
No. 115 March 1974 Vintage Comic Books, Comic Books Art, Comic Art, Mash Characters, Comic Covers, Mad Magazine, Magazine Covers
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No. 115 March 1974
No. 124 May 1975 Book And Magazine, American Humor, Howard The Duck, Retro Comic, Running For President
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No. 124 May 1975
October 1982 cover #MASH Alan Alda Mash, Mash 4077, Teen Magazine, House Book, Catwoman, Book Lists, Cartoon Art
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October 1982 cover #MASH
"For Monsters Only" issue Halloween Monster, Monster Party, Halloween Horror, Lorraine, John Power, Monster Strike, Horror Pictures
TWENTIETH CENTURY KID
"For Monsters Only" issue
Reprint of Cracked Magazine #1 Tissue, Warehouse, Newspaper
Reprint of Cracked Magazine #1
Sylvester, by artists through the years. | 9-86 Retro Home, Artist
Sylvester, by artists through the years. | 9-86
Our first issue, back in 1958. We made the leap to the Internet the very next year. Color Me, Vines, Vintage World Maps, Fun, Internet, Regular
Our first issue, back in 1958. We made the leap to the Internet the very next year.
January 1978 Star Wars Comic Book Covers, Alien Artwork, Strange History
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January 1978 Star Wars
"This was my favorite issue of Cracked. I read it about 100 times during the summer between fourth and fifth grade, and I wrote my own version of it which I read aloud to my class." -- Tom Reimann Old Comics, Archie Comics, Funny Cartoons, Funny Comics, Arc Of The Covenant, Funny Dialogues, Scary Books, Famous Monsters, Handy Dandy
Start The Machine
"This was my favorite issue of Cracked. I read it about 100 times during the summer between fourth and fifth grade, and I wrote my own version of it which I read aloud to my class." -- Tom Reimann
November 1979 #Alien Alien Movie 1979, Aliens Movie, Magazine Rack, Scary Snakes
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November 1979 #Alien
May 1978 John Severin cover, from BEFORE Battlestar Galactica was cool. Battlestar Galactica 1978, Drax The Destroyer, Ec Comics, Western Comics, Comics Artist, Science Fiction Film
BATTLESTAR GALACTICA (1978) CRACKED Art by Severin
May 1978 John Severin cover, from BEFORE Battlestar Galactica was cool.
May 1988 Don Martin cover Alfred E Neuman, A Different World, Dolly Parton, Vintage Books
May 1988 Don Martin cover
April '93. Also a key plank in Ted Cruz's filibuster platform. All Horror Movies, Jason Voorhees, Ted Cruz, Goes, Evil, Old Things, Army
April '93. Also a key plank in Ted Cruz's filibuster platform.
Winter '93. This issue would later inspire Ted Cruz to filibuster Obamacare. Horror Art, Horror Movies, Freddy's Nightmares, Addams Family Values, Make Up Test, Abnormal Psychology
Winter '93. This issue would later inspire Ted Cruz to filibuster Obamacare.
November 1975. To be fair, JAWZ had it coming. Action Books
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November 1975. To be fair, JAWZ had it coming.
"We should retire the bad teeth as Britain's national stereotype of choice. A study performed by OECD…has concluded that the British have the very best teeth in the entire world, with an average of just 0.6 of a tooth decaying per citizen. Not just "not the worst"--the absolute fucking best! … It turns out Poland has the worst teeth, with an average of almost four rotted teeth per ingenious Polack." Bad Teeth, Nice Teeth, Entire World, Stereotype, Baltic Sea, Britain, Turn Ons, Ingenious, Citizen
The 5 Most Statistically Full of Sh!t National Stereotypes
"We should retire the bad teeth as Britain's national stereotype of choice. A study performed by OECD…has concluded that the British have the very best teeth in the entire world, with an average of just 0.6 of a tooth decaying per citizen. Not just "not the worst"--the absolute fucking best! … It turns out Poland has the worst teeth, with an average of almost four rotted teeth per ingenious Polack."
"In movies, body armor (made from a material called Kevlar) turns most guns from magical death-wands to hilariously overbuilt Airsoft rifles. … The type of bulletproof vest you can actually conceal under your clothes provides exceptional protection against most handguns. But against an assault rifle? It's only slightly more effective than body paint and prayers to Khorne." Movie Scenes, Film Movie, Peter Berg, Arizona City, Arizona State University, Tax Credits, Film School, Miami Vice, Planet Of The Apes
5 Ridiculous Gun Myths Everyone Believes (Thanks to Movies)
"In movies, body armor (made from a material called Kevlar) turns most guns from magical death-wands to hilariously overbuilt Airsoft rifles. … The type of bulletproof vest you can actually conceal under your clothes provides exceptional protection against most handguns. But against an assault rifle? It's only slightly more effective than body paint and prayers to Khorne."
"Guess what really happens when you wake up sleepwalkers: They wake up. Seriously, that's it. No gruesome deaths, no dramatic injuries. True, they might be groggy and disoriented, but come on -- who doesn't feel that way when some bastard suddenly comes and shakes you awake in the middle of a dream in which you thought you were fighting zombies with your old gym coach?" Health Myths, What Really Happened, Bastards, Zombies, Awake, Suddenly, That Way, Dramatic, Seriously
5 Ridiculous Health Myths You Probably Believe
"Guess what really happens when you wake up sleepwalkers: They wake up. Seriously, that's it. No gruesome deaths, no dramatic injuries. True, they might be groggy and disoriented, but come on -- who doesn't feel that way when some bastard suddenly comes and shakes you awake in the middle of a dream in which you thought you were fighting zombies with your old gym coach?"
"In private, [Victorians] made up for [their prudish reputation] by producing extraordinary amounts of porn. And not just any porn, but the type of porn that would make the most seasoned Internet deviant blush and cover their table legs. … As for the famous prudishness of Queen Victoria, not only is the 'think of England' exchange untrue, but the Queen's diaries reveal she was extremely fond of sex, and often presented her husband with male and female nude artworks." Queen Victoria Family, Queen Victoria Prince Albert, Victoria Reign, Reine Victoria, Victoria And Albert, Ile De Wight, British Royal Families, Royal Family, Palais De Kensington
5 Ridiculous Sex Myths From History (You Probably Believe)
"In private, [Victorians] made up for [their prudish reputation] by producing extraordinary amounts of porn. And not just any porn, but the type of porn that would make the most seasoned Internet deviant blush and cover their table legs. … As for the famous prudishness of Queen Victoria, not only is the 'think of England' exchange untrue, but the Queen's diaries reveal she was extremely fond of sex, and often presented her husband with male and female nude artworks."
"Silicone [breast] implants are associated with everything from cancer to autoimmune disease, scleroderma, connective tissue disease, and injuries from sexy pillow fights. .. The good news is that...there was never any hard evidence that funbag prostheses are responsible for any of these horrible diseases. … Women were actually getting their boobs pumped up for a couple of decades with next to no problem before Ralph Nader inexplicably declared in the '80s that silicone implants cause cancer." Silicone Implants, Scleroderma, Implants Breast, Healthy Detox, Detox Recipes, Autoimmune Disease, Ehow, Myths, Products
6 Ridiculous Myths You Believe About Stuff You Use Every Day
"Silicone [breast] implants are associated with everything from cancer to autoimmune disease, scleroderma, connective tissue disease, and injuries from sexy pillow fights. .. The good news is that...there was never any hard evidence that funbag prostheses are responsible for any of these horrible diseases. … Women were actually getting their boobs pumped up for a couple of decades with next to no problem before Ralph Nader inexplicably declared in the '80s that silicone implants cause cancer."
"Research shows that the amount of beer you drink and the size of your belly have no correlation whatsoever. Hell, if you keep your beer intake under even a modicum of control, chances are it doesn't even do that much to your general weight gain." How Little We Know, Bacon Sandwich, Booze, Weight Gain, Fyi, Bathroom Medicine Cabinet, Cure, Liquor Cabinet
The 5 Most Ridiculous Drinking Myths You Probably Believe
"Research shows that the amount of beer you drink and the size of your belly have no correlation whatsoever. Hell, if you keep your beer intake under even a modicum of control, chances are it doesn't even do that much to your general weight gain."